Welcome to The Brighter Side of Everything.
This newsletter serves a simple purpose → To help you build optimism, resilience and a solution-focused perspective.
Each week, I’ll share actionable insights that not only brighten your day but position you to be a leader within your own life and seize life’s opportunities.
Read time: 20-30 minutes.

Why Did It Go Well? - Asking why shouldn’t be saved for the bad days.
Bright Reads - Quick links to fun or insightful articles.
Jadav Payeng - Twenty bamboo seedlings.
Bookmarks - ’Life Lessons from a Brain Surgeon’ by Rahul Jandial.
A Bright Idea to Consider - A few more listens.
A Previous Post - Simple truth.
Positively Hilarious - Smile like you mean it.
Daily Gratitude Journal - Transform your daily routine through reflection.
Hello, Brighter Side readers! ☀️
Fall in Toronto has been spectacular this year 🍂🍁
It’s always beautiful but the colours in our area of the city seem extra vibrant this season.
It’s my favourite season by a margin.
But if I’m honest, I do kinda like ‘em all.

This week, I want you to think back to the last really good day (or even moment) you had.
Can you remember why it went so well?
A lot of people don't, and that's the challenge we’re shining a light on.
It’s about giving our best moments the same attention we assign to our worst.
We also meet an incredible man who grew a forest most of the world wasn’t aware existed, we explore a brain surgeon’s book that is loaded with remarkable stories, and look at why some things only seem to win us over on the second or third go.
Here’s to creating more days that’re worth repeating.
See you on the Brighter Side,
Chris
P.S. Please feel free to send me feedback on how I can improve. I respond to every email.

Vanity Fair’s New Show, Where Nothing Is Off the Table

On Fair Game from Vanity Fair, join Mark Guiducci for in-depth and far-reaching conversations with the most interesting characters from the worlds of Hollywood, Politics, Style, Silicon Valley, and beyond.
From acclaimed actors and political figures to tech leaders and style visionaries, Fair Game goes beyond the headlines to uncover the people, personalities, and ideas driving the cultural conversation.


When something goes wrong?
We tend to replay it over and over in our mind.
The comment that came out completely wrong.
The argument that never needed to happen.
We pick the moment apart until we're sure we know where things slipped.
The thoughts occupy our minds on the drive home, or in the shower.
Or at two in the morning, while we’re staring hopelessly at the ceiling.
When something goes right, though?
We tend to enjoy the moment, then move on immediately.
Think about that conversation you’d been dreading that ended up bringing the two of you closer.
Or the dinner where everyone stayed at the table chatting and laughing well after the plates were cleared.
Lovely.
Then on we go.
We almost never stop to ask why.
Which is a strange way to live, when you think about it.
Because the good moments are the ones we're hoping to see again.
The Debrief We Skip
I first noticed this while playing sports in my youth and have seen it reaffirmed throughout my corporate career.
After a loss, everyone has something to say.
Like what went wrong, who missed what, and what we absolutely must fix before next week.
After a win, most are inclined to celebrate with a few hugs and high fives.
Then move on.
Very few would stop to actually ask ‘why’ we won.
The teams and businesses I’ve been involved with that took the time to study their wins as closely as their losses?
Were the ones that improved the most.
Every time.
They identified what was working, so they could double down on it.
Sports makes these examples easy to see because it operates with a scoreboard.
You win or you lose.
Real life rarely gives us anything quite so clear.
Nobody will blow the whistle at the end of a great and productive afternoon.
There's no final score for the conversation with your partner that made real progress, or the week at work where you felt sharp right from Monday through Friday.
So these moments often slip by without a second look.
And the clues they hold disappear with them.
They're so worth going back for.
"Follow effective action with quiet reflection. From the quiet reflection will come even more effective action."
Wired to Study the Wreckage
Part of this comes down to how we're built.
In a previous edition, we explored negativity bias, the way bad experiences grab our attention more easily and hang around longer than the good ones.
For our ancestors, remembering which berries would make you sick mattered a bunch more than remembering which ones tasted nice.
There's a second reason, too.
A bad moment catches us off guard, and surprise sends our mind hunting for causes.
When things go the way we hoped?
There's nothing to solve, so the hunt never starts.
Hospitals are a great example.
For decades, they've learned the majority of their lessons from incident reports.
When something goes wrong, it gets written up and investigated so it doesn't happen again.
It's an essential system.
But it also only ever looks in one direction.
Erik Hollnagel, a Danish safety researcher, pointed out the catch.
In most workplaces, hospitals included, things go right far more often than they go wrong.
Study only the failures and you're learning from a thin slice of what really happens.
He and his colleagues argued for looking at what goes right on top of what goes wrong.
In 2014, Adrian Plunkett, a consultant in the children's intensive care unit at Birmingham Children's Hospital in England, put that idea to work.
Years earlier, as a patient himself, he'd received care that impressed him and had written a letter to thank the staff.
When he later ran into one of them by chance, he learned that the thank-you had unfortunately never reached them.
As a result, he established an additional report for his unit.
Alongside the reports for errors?
Staff could now report excellence.
The chance to acknowledge a colleague who took the time to talk a frightened family through a hard day with genuine compassion.
A newly implemented care plan that worked better than anyone expected.
Each report went directly to the people involved, and their good practice was shared so the whole team could learn from it.
He called it Learning from Excellence, and it has since spread to other hospitals in the UK and beyond.
His team found that a simple thank-you might be one of the most powerful improvement tools they had.
A statement that the vast majority of us know and understand, yet it still remains overlooked on so many occasions.
Most of us keep the same lopsided records on ourselves.
Our bad days get the full write-up, with every detail saved for later so we can ruminate unnecessarily several times in the coming days.
While the good days barely get acknowledged.
Maybe it’s time we filed a few excellence reports of our own.
Be Your Own Cheerleader
We're experts at having a critical eye and spotting what needs work, and most of us could list our weaknesses in our sleep.
Getting better matters, of course it does.
But there's always plenty we already do well.
Sometimes you have to be your own biggest cheerleader.
Stop and say it, even if it's only in your head.
Man, that actually went really well.
It can feel a bit awkward at first, mainly because it feels unnatural.
But it’s crucial to realise that quietly noting to yourself that you’ve handled something well is a long way from having an inflated ego and thinking you're better than anyone else.
The research sides with giving yourself that pat on the back.
Psychologists Fred Bryant and Joseph Veroff spent years studying savouring, the habits that make a good moment feel bigger and last longer.
One they identified is self-congratulation: letting yourself feel proud and owning your part in what went well.
In 2005, Martin Seligman, whose book Learned Optimism I’ve previously recommended, tested an exercise built on the same instinct.
Every night for a week, people wrote down three things that went well that day, and why each one happened.
They ended up happier and less depressed than a comparison group, and the effect still held strong six months later.
The why is the step most people overlook.
And it’s so obvious when you slow down and consider it.
Because it's where you find your fingerprints.
The evidence.
Maybe you went for a walk when the couch was calling your name.
Or you asked a great follow-up question and actively listened to the whole answer. Why?
Why did that happen?
By understanding "why" you do something, you can see your purpose clearly and make sure your actions are matched to your goals.
Making each step you take more intentional.
Because you’ve likely played a role in more of your good moments than you give yourself credit for.
Good Parts, Bad Parts
My sister had her three girls years before my son came into the world.
I was off travelling the world at the time, so I watched her become a parent from a distance and lived a slice of it vicariously through her.
I couldn’t have had a better teacher.
There aren't many people on this planet I respect more as a parent.
Her approach and her commitment to it are something else, and her three girls have grown into wonderful humans who bring so much good into the world.
So when my wife and I had our first child, the things my sister and my parents had to say obviously carried a lot of weight.
One of the best things she passed along was a game.
We call it “Good Parts, Bad Parts,” and we play it at the dinner table.
You might have heard of it as Roses and Thorns, or Highs and Lows.
I’ve always liked that ours doesn’t dress anything up.
Good is good, bad is bad, and the kids are clear on what they’re being asked.
Everyone takes turns sharing the good parts of their day, followed by the bad parts.
And why.
The bad parts lead to conversations about lessons, challenges, empathy, and what we might do differently next time.
The good parts are where we slow down.
We ask what made it great.
The kids get to tell the whole story, with as much detail as they like.
Sometimes it’s as brief as a few words, other times they’re still talking 5 minutes later.
Then we talk about how we could have more days like that, and which of the choices they made helped to set it all up.
Without ever calling it by name, we've been teaching them to properly debrief both their good days and bad.
Over the years, the game has covered plenty.
Most of what the kids share stays at our dinner table, and that's how it should be.
We don't play it every night, it's more like two or three times a week.
But my kids are now 13 and almost 9, and it’s them that ask for us to play.
When a 13-year-old still asks for a dinner table game with his parents?
The game is doing something right.
Do More of What Works
In the early 1980s, at a family therapy centre in Milwaukee, Steve de Shazer and Insoo Kim Berg noticed something about the people who came to see them.
Their problems had exceptions.
A couple who say they fight constantly usually have evenings when they don't.
Instead of digging further into what was broken, de Shazer and Berg started asking about those exceptions.
What was different on the good days?
What did you do?
The answers often held the beginnings of a solution the person already had access to.
Their approach became known as solution-focused brief therapy, and it's now practised right around the world.
In my very first edition, I stated I was on a mission to build a global army of solution-focused optimists.
This is a big part of what I had in mind.
Once you know why something went well, you can start laying the groundwork for it to happen again.
Say a conversation with your partner went way better than usual.
Was it the timing?
Were you walking slowly side by side rather than facing off across the kitchen bench?
Which aspects of the experience differed from previous attempts?
A great night with friends where everything clicks and you have a riot of a time has a recipe too.
Maybe it was a long lunch that everybody needed and nobody wanted to end, or the friend who took the reins and made plans for you all.
Most never write that recipe down as a record for future use.
"If it ain't broke, don't fix it. Once you know what works, do more of it. If it doesn't work, don't do it again. Do something different."
Having Good Days on Purpose
Here are a few simple ideas worth considering this week:
When a good moment arrives, ask why (and be specific): "It was nice" doesn't tell you much. "We ate outside, nobody was rushing and we'd all slept well" gives you something to work with. Two things are worth pinning down: what you did that helped, and what you'd set up the same way again.
Give yourself some credit: This is important: name the part you played. Some of it may be timing or luck, and that's fine too. Enjoy that luck, just don't build your plans around it.
Write down the why: Try Seligman's exercise for a week: three things that went well, along with why you believe each one happened.
Turn the why into a default setting: If a walk before breakfast made your whole day better, put it in the calendar. If your best conversations happen in the car, take the long way home now and then.
Play Good Parts, Bad Parts: It works just as well without kids. Try it with your partner over dinner or with your team at the end of a project. Just make sure the good parts get as much airtime as the bad ones.
My Takeaway
Reflection has a reputation as something we do after things fall apart.
We treat it like a post-mortem or a good hard look in the mirror.
But I see it as one of the most optimistic habits you can build.
When you ask why something went well, you refuse to treat good things as random.
They have causes too.
And causes can be repeated.
I’ve experienced this first hand playing sports and in the corporate world.
But everyday life is where it counts.
There's an endless supply of good moments available to us if we're paying attention.
Moments like a phone call with an old friend that leaves you juiced and grinning from ear to ear.
A dinner where the good parts take so long everyone has finished eating and you don’t have time to tell the bad ones.
So when one comes along, enjoy it.
Give yourself a pat on the back.
For real.
Then take a minute to work out why it happened, and put a few things in place so it happens as often as humanly possible.
We put so much energy into making sure we learn from the bad days so they don't happen again.
Let’s spend a little more time making sure the good ones do.
"What you appreciate appreciates."
If you’d like to explore this concept further, this video from Shawn Achor is one of my favourite talks on why the good stuff deserves more of our attention.
Watch it here:

🔍 Why Getting More Specific About Your Emotions Could Matter - Swapping a vague “I feel bad” for something more precise, like disappointed, anxious or embarrassed, is linked with slightly healthier ways of coping, and psychology writer Kendra Cherry offers four simple questions to help you move one step beyond “good” or “bad,” while being honest that naming the feeling is only the start and what you do with it next matters most. Read more →(Explore Psychology)
🏫 A Texas School District Named Its New Elementary School After the Custodian Who Looked After Its Kids for 39 Years - “Miss Marilyn” Hampton never went to college and sometimes felt like a failure because of it, but she spent her career buying school supplies, helping students study for tests and running the ticket booth at football games, so when the Aubrey school board asked her to unroll a red carpet stitched with the words “Marilyn Hampton Elementary School,” she burst into tears and called it an honour she never thought she’d live to see. Read more → (Good News Network)
🐊 Biologists in Mexico Brought a Mangrove Forest Back to Life With an Aztec Farming Trick and a Few Crocodiles - After row upon row of planted seedlings kept dying, biologist Aníbal Ramírez Soto tried raising them on small mounds of soil modelled on the Aztecs’ floating gardens, and the 2,000 trees his team planted became more than 4,000 as wild seedlings drifted in on the tide and took root alongside them, reaching 80% canopy cover by year eight, with reintroduced crocodiles now back in the lagoons as part of the plan to keep the whole ecosystem healthy. Read more → (Mongabay)
💚 How to Treat Jealousy as an Alarm Bell Instead of Letting It Run the Show - Clinical psychologist Carla Marie Manly explains how to tell “reactive” jealousy, sparked by something that really happened, from “suspicious” jealousy rooted in old wounds, then walks through gentle steps for noticing where the feeling sits in your body, meeting it with self-compassion instead of shame and talking about it with the people you love without placing blame. Read more → (Psyche)
💡 An Implant That Helps People Read Again and a Patch That Ends Finger-Prick Tests Are Among 2026’s Best Inventions - TIME’s Best Inventions of 2026 list is full of ideas born at the University of California, including a retinal implant that gave 80% of patients with macular degeneration meaningful improvements in their vision, a self-steering power wheelchair designed to take the worry out of narrow doorways and crowded elevators, and a device that pulls drinkable water out of thin air without any power. Read more → (University of California)
🍝 Fifteen Restaurants in Sardinia Are Swapping Phones for Games and Crayons at the Family Dinner Table - In a month-long pilot that began this November, families who tuck their devices away at participating restaurants across the island are handed a “Reunion Kit” of games and drawing activities developed with input from Italy’s paediatricians, and the idea proved so popular with restaurant owners that it grew from eight volunteer venues to fifteen before the first meal was even served. Read more → (Euro Weekly News)


Jadav "Molai" Payeng, born in Jorhat, Assam, India.
In 1979, the Brahmaputra River in Assam, India, flooded.
This is a common occurrence in the region, these floods can cause widespread devastation, affecting thousands of people in the region.
As the water receded, it revealed a sandbar near Kokilamukh teeming with snakes.
The floods had dropped them onto open sand with no shade to speak of whatsoever, and the heat killed them.
A curious teenager from the Mising community discovered them, sat down amongst them on the sand and cried.
Then, he chose to go looking for a way to stop it from ever happening again.
Try Bamboo
That boy was Jadav Payeng.
He asked the forest department whether trees could grow on the sandbar.
By his account, they advised him that nothing would, loosely suggesting he should try bamboo.
So he did.
He planted about twenty bamboo seedlings straight into the bare sand.
A year later, the government arrived with a bigger plan.
The Social Forestry Division began planting 200 hectares along that stretch of river and hired Jadav as one of the labourers.
When that project wound up, the other workers left.
Jadav chose to stay.
He had no machinery to work with though, and was unable to haul river water to every sapling.
So, he ingeniously constructed small bamboo platforms overhead and placed an earthen pot on each, with holes in the base.
This ensured a steady drip of water continued throughout the week.
He also brought in ants, termites and earthworms to work through the soil.
He kept cattle on the land and sold the milk in order to get by.
And every single day, he planted.
In 2014, the publication Al Jazeera reported that he’d planted saplings every day for 34 years straight.
"In the grief of those dead snakes, I created this forest."
Nobody Was Watching
For twenty-nine years, very few people from beyond the nearby villages knew the forest was even there.
Then in 2008, a herd of more than a hundred wild elephants damaged homes in a village close by and then disappeared into the trees.
Forest officials managed to follow them in and were astounded by just how big and dense the forest had become.
The area is now known as Molai Kathoni, or Molai's Forest, after Jadav's nickname.
He estimates it to span 1,360 acres, making it bigger than New York's Central Park.
And remarkably, bengal tigers, one-horned rhinos, deer and vultures all now live there.
A herd of elephants returns every year for a few months, with many of their calves being born in the forest.
In 2017, Jadav summed up for NPR how the forest spread in very simple terms: "You plant one or two trees, and they have to seed."
Bamboo came first, then he moved on to cotton trees, and then later again, teak.
Each of those trees dropped seeds of their own, and over time the forest took on some of the planting itself.
In 2021, researchers who studied Molai Kathoni discovered that after 39 years, its mix of species & plant diversity were similar to that of a natural forest nearby.
That’s compounding in action.
Small efforts, repeated for years, until the returns start arriving on their own.
Jadav’s forest is one of the best examples of it I’ve seen.
What It Cost
Those same elephants that brought attention to the forest unfortunately also flattened crops and homes, including Jadav's own.
Angry villagers cut down trees and set fire to parts of the forest.
When islanders suggested he cut it back, his answer was extremely blunt:
"You will have to kill me first before you kill the trees."
By 2012, he’d lost about a hundred cows and buffalo to tigers, and the milk production from that herd was the family's only income at the time.
Even so, he told NPR, "I never feel danger in the forest."
He calls it his biggest home.
The challenges have been ever present with poachers coming for the rhinos and the river forcing his family to move their stilt house three times.
Recognition arrived very late for Jadav..
Jawaharlal Nehru University named him the "Forest Man of India" in 2012, and in 2015 he received the Padma Shri, one of India's highest civilian honours.
He’s now in his sixties now and is still planting trees.
In 2022, he and his daughter Munmuni decided to start a second forest nearby.
On 28 December 2025, a fire Munmuni says was deliberately set destroyed more than 5,500 of its saplings.
Local campaigners linked it to illegal sand mining, and the district temporarily suspended mining in the area while police investigated.
Two more fires followed.
By mid-February 2026, the latest had burned through nearly 100 hectares.
"While we can replant trees," Munmuni said, "the ecological damage cannot be restored easily."
Practical Lessons from Jadav Payeng
Let grief point somewhere: Jadav cried over those snakes, then moved himself forward via a question. When something breaks your heart, find the first useful step you can take, and take it.
Keep going after the official version ends: The government plantation finished up and the workers all went home. Jadav never stopped and continued planting for decades. When the program or the funding stops, check whether your reason for starting also stopped with it.
Build something that can outgrow you: His first trees went on to seed the next ones. Look for effort that keeps paying out after you step back, like teaching a skill to someone who'll pass it on.
My Takeaway
Twenty-nine years.
That’s how long Jadav planted trees before the outside world chose to notice.
He didn’t chase headlines or seek out an award to aim for.
Most of us want some proof before we commit to something.
We want to know that the effort will work, and we tend to prefer someone to notice those efforts.
Jadav had neither.
He had twenty bamboo seedlings and a forest department advising him that nothing would grow.
He chose to move forward and planted them anyway.
Then he came back the next day.
And the next.
And the next.
That’s the version of optimism I admire the most.
The kind that goes out and creates its own proof.
Today there are tigers living in that forest, which is pretty damn cool.
All of it started with one teenager crying genuine tears on a sandbar.
One.
So, I encourage you to ask yourself: What would you plant if you knew nobody would notice for twenty-nine years?
And I’m not talking about trees here.
Secondly, would you come back the next day?
"If man does not take care of all animals, who will?"
Canadian filmmaker William Douglas McMaster spent time with Jadav for this 16-minute documentary. It’s the best way to see the forest for yourself:

William says he used to be a TV producer.
Now he's homeless, emotionally flat, and a deep despondency has taken over his life.
Then a surgeon dicovers a tumour about the size of a chicken's egg in his frontal lobes.
The frontal lobes sit right behind the forehead and help drive our motivation and emotion.
Doctors have documented the same pattern in other patients, where a frontal tumour looks like depression until it’s found.
Just a few short months after the operation?
William has not only reconnected with his children, he also has a job, a car and an apartment.
Read that part again ⬆️
William’s story is one of many inspiring stories shared within 'Life Lessons from a Brain Surgeon.’
Why It's Worth Your Time
I’d absorb almost anything a brain surgeon has to say about how to live.
My interest in the brain began simply by reading books.
As a teenager it was Stephen King, lots of Stephen King.
A little later I became more curious about those who sit outside of the norm, and wanted to understand why.
That led me into criminology and also the chemistry that lies within the structure of their brain.
Psychology and behavioural science came next.
Though, after university I chose to leave criminology behind, because I saw where it led: a career spent dealing with that for the rest of my life.
My fascination with the brain has always remained strong.
So, when I have access to understand what it's like to be a brain surgeon, directly from one, I’m all ears.
The reviews of this one were mixed enough that I questioned reading, but it was fascinating to hear from a brain surgeon directly.
Dr Rahul Jandial is a neurosurgeon and neurobiologist with both an MD and a PhD.
His book, which is a Sunday Times bestseller, shares stories of patients with extreme brain damage, disorders and illnesses, demonstrating what they reveal about the mind.
"Every brain can make a comeback following a devastating illness, or injury."
What Makes It Stand Out
William isn't the only patient.
A language teacher has to choose whether to forego her understanding of Spanish or English.
A teenager faints and learns that deep breathing can be the difference between life and death.
I love talking about this.
The adult brain can reorganise itself after injury, within limits, and the stories in this book make that fact easy to believe.
Some of Jandial’s points surface more than once, making it a repetitive read at times.
But the fact that you get to hear a surgeon talk about his work in his own voice makes a uniquely engaging read.
His insights and firsthand accounts provide an understanding of the complexities and challenges faced in this medical field.
Offering us as readers an authentic glimpse into the life and thoughts of a brain surgeon.
If you’re looking for a neuroscience textbook?
Look elsewhere.
Practical Lessons from Life Lessons from a Brain Surgeon
Protect your sleep: Aim for seven or more hours, at roughly the same time each night. Sleep helps the brain consolidate memories into long-term storage.
Use your other hand: Try using your non-dominant hand for a week. It's one of Jandial's brain challenges, and an easy (well, maybe not easy) way to ask your brain to do something new.
Breathe on purpose: Sit somewhere quiet and focus on your breath for ten to fifteen minutes. In through the nose, hold, out through the mouth, counting four for each step.
My Takeaway
What would you like to understand about your own brain?
I picked this book up to see through the window into a brain surgeon's world, but it’s William’s story that has stayed with me.
A man who found himself in a very dark place and surprisingly discovered that the cause was physical, and could be treated.
How much of who we are comes down to our brain?
I don't have the full answer to that question, but in recent years the amount of research and information regarding brain function has grown significantly.
Recent advances in neuroscience supported by technology have provided deeper insights into how the brain works.
This is leading us to a better understanding of cognitive processes, mental health, and neurological disorders.
Having read this book, I've come away even more assured that our brain can bounce back, and heal itself in the right environment.
If you want to learn more yourself?
I recommend giving this one a read.
“Any man could, if he were so inclined, be the sculptor of his own brain.”
Got a recommendation?
Please share; I'm always keen for great suggestions.


The Lesson
We lived in Vancouver for eight wonderful years.
Then a job opportunity saw our young family move across Canada to Toronto.
I arrived with a scorecard in the back of my mind.
While living in Vancouver I got caught up in the comparison at times: the weather, the mountains against the flat, the outdoor lifestyle against the big city.
It’s a common conversation between major cities within a country and these two cities couldn’t be more different from one another.
After moving here, we quickly realised Toronto has so much more to offer than that scorecard ever allowed.
My favourite is the fact that we have a library 50 metres from our house.
Free parks and ice skating in winter.
Festivals, pools and parks in summer.
Hiking and biking all around the city.
Great food from every corner of the globe.
Even snow hills close by, which I still call hills, because they definitely ain’t mountains.
There's so much available to you in this city that it can feel overwhelming.
You just have to know where to look.
Toronto has turned out to be one of the most wonderfully communal, diverse and vibrant cities I've experienced anywhere on earth.
It feels like home now.
Part of that is due to Toronto being a great city, but I also suspect part of it is time.
The Japanese (of course) have a proverb that relates to the second part.
It means a place will grow on you.
Along the way, getting myself used to living in Toronto started to feel more like loving it.
"Sumeba miyako." (Wherever you live becomes the capital.)
Go Deeper
In 1968, the social psychologist Robert Zajonc tested this theory by using words nobody could really have an opinion about.
He showed 72 people twelve nonsense words, telling them they’re Turkish adjectives.
Each word was visible on a card for about two seconds, and then people said it out loud.
Some words surfaced once.
Others showed up twenty-five times.
While some never appeared at all.
Then, he asked whether each word meant something good, or something bad.
The more often they noticed a word, the better they believed it was.
The words themsleves meant nothing,
All it took to make that internal decision was familiarity.
He also tried the same exercise with Chinese-like characters that people struggled to pronounce, along with photographs of men's faces.
The same effect held true for all but one of the characters and nine of the twelve faces.
Zajonc called the pattern mere exposure: we come to like things simply from being around them.
My theory is that plenty of the things we choose to write off early?
Just haven't been given a second chance.
Practical Lessons
Give something a few more tries: Pick one thing you wrote off after a single go: an album, a type of food, a place, even a person. Decide in advance how many more tries it gets, say three, so one bad day doesn’t settle it. Then notice how your opinion shifts.
Ask what kind of no it is: “This is wrong for me” and “this is new” might feel identical on the first day. The difference is whether you can name an actual reason. If it clashes with something you value, that’s a real no. If all you can say is that it felt strange, it hasn’t really had a fair go.
Look at the other side of it: Familiarity can make things we’d never choose today feel comfortable, just because they’ve always been there. Pick one habit or routine and ask yourself: if I were starting fresh, would I sign up for this again? If the answer is no, you’ve learned something worth knowing.
My Takeaway
Think of a song you didn’t love the first time you heard it.
Too slow, maybe, or just not what you’re in the mood for.
Then it showed up again, in the car or on someone else’s playlist.
A few plays later you were humming it, and before long it’s found its way onto your playlist.
Toronto has been that song for me.
I carried a non existent scorecard with me on arrival, and it took a few more listens.
We may not stay here forever.
But this stretch has been wonderful, and I’d have missed a good chunk of it if I’d kept measuring the city against somewhere else.
Plenty of good people, things and places won’t win you over on the first listen.
Give them a few more.
“We love the things we love for what they are.”




Transform your daily routine with my specially crafted gratitude journal.
Start (or end) each day with a moment of reflection and positivity.
As you develop daily your gratitude, you're also helping grant wishes to children facing critical illnesses.
It's a powerful cycle of hope and optimism.
🌟 What's Inside:
Thoughtful prompts to inspire daily gratitude.
Space for personal reflections and affirmations.
Beautifully designed pages to make each entry a delightful experience.
Ready to embrace the power of gratitude?
Click here to order a copy now!

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